4. Keep a record of your experiences

As a new generation arrives, there are many great qualities that I observe within them, however there is one observation that I despair of, and that is “the lost practise of privacy’.

Today the catch cry of the masses is about popularity and the pursuit of being famous. The pursuit of sixty minutes of fame has a generation engulfed with watching role playing TV. There are a multitude of programmes that currently numb the minds of our generation. Programmes such as:

Survivor, Big brother, The Apprentice, Beebo, Myblog, You-tube and a plethora of outlandish scenarios that nullify privacy and decorum, in exchange for an indiscriminate world audience.

With the advent of instant messaging, information can be transmitted to anyone, anywhere at the tap of “send”. Information and situations that were once within the domain of intimacy and privacy are now blasted across the world stage for anyone and everyone to observe. Discretion, privacy, honour and intimacy, are no longer virtues held in high esteem by these new found “celebrities”.

I remember a story I heard many years ago.

A young boy had been caught lying often and as a result his parents taught him a lesson. They led him to a fence post and with a box of nails, began to hammer a nail into the post for every lie he had been found guilty of. Pretty soon there was little room for any more nails. His parents told him that they would remove a nail every time he told the truth. Months passed by and finally the post was nail free, but on seeing the post full of holes the son began to cry. “But what about the holes mum, the holes are still there!” “Well son” said his mum, “That’s true of all the words we use. We may be sorry we said them, but the effects remain. We can fill the holes up and paint the post but underneath they will always be there.”

It’s always best to think before we speak and in this technological world that we live, always pause before we hit “send” or “upload.”    

We primarily learn about ourselves as we navigate in solitude, not on the world stage. As a public speaker, I am mindful of what is for private consideration and that which is for my own growth and well-being. The things and situations that have learned privately are not always for public declaration.

Here are some factors that will assist you :

a) Keep a private diary of your intimate thoughts (and keep it off the internet)

b) Try to mind map your circumstances (use words to describe how you are)

c) When you are through the storm, revisit it to reveal how you responded

d) Maintain and safeguard your self respect, as other will not

e) Mystique is an empowering quality that defines the inner you, be careful and confident with whom and how you share it.

Maintaining self respect and control in a world that thrives on exposure and the loss of dignity, is perhaps the most intimate key in maintaining hope in who you are and who you were created to be.